Crystal's Web site Webolumn: Checkin out the internets

From the depths of my brain and the great abyss of the internet, here are my newest picks for this week...

1) She has a boyfriend
i always hear how much guys hate those girls who bring up their boyfriends within the first 2 seconds of a conversation. this guy reenacts that frustration through a series of skits in which he tries to pick up various women being a gentleman but never a "gentle man" and then gets shut down by the ever so subtle "blah blah blah my boyfriend..." obviously this discourages the man. so he reacts the way any sophisticated brit would. he yells, "FUCK YOU!" followed by some sort of aggressive act, i.e. throwing a potted plant through a car window, dropping the tray of drinks he's holding, or punting a few dogs. while these are justifiable reactions to misdirection, do guys really prefer the ignorance of not knowing from the beginning that it's a lost cause?



WHISKEY!!



2) ManBabies
ManBabies.com - Dad?
GET MORE AT ManBabies.com!

this is one of the the weirdest sites i've ever come across. looks like anyone can contribute! all you need is a picture of yourself and your small child (infants preferable) and basic photoshop skills. i say "basic" because most of these aren't terribly good quality. but if they were photoshop experts (Ed note: like Kelly!), i would probably have nightmares about these freaks.





3) SomethingStore

this online shop is like an endless supply of surprise gifts... to yourself! every day can be your birthday! all you do is send them $10 and you get back a surprise. what could it be? a coffee maker? a sewing machine? electronics? magazines? clothes? knives? broken glass? WHO KNOWS!!! i'm actually considering giving it a shot. the consumer rating is really high so the stuff they send you can't be that shitty. what is there to lose other than $10? any takers?









4) it's a match!



i've actually gotten back into SNL lately. mostly because it doesn't SUCK anymore. this past weekend's host was shia labeouf. i'm not a terribly big fan. he's alright. but he did a really great job on snl. this skit was by far the best i've seen in a long time. it takes place on the set of the old 70s game show "it's a match" with the usual contestants being washed up actors/actresses (for you feminists) just trying to make jokes instead of playing any type of real game. shia impersonates a 70s magician named doug henning. he makes the entire skit! i love it. everything from his pink and purple little girl's long sleeve shirt with the unicorn plastered on the front to his cat stevens looking shoulder length perm. did i mention he does MAGIC?!

5) the world is just awesome


i just wanted to add this video because it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. i'm sure you've all seen it. it's a commercial for the discovery channel and it has a lot of beautiful images of all the characteristics that make up our world. almost makes you forget about how much we really hate earth, i.e. global warming. TAKE THAT BITCH!! p.s. - anyone notice stephen hawking in there? i know he's contributed to the fields of gravity and cosmology, but wtf?