The gays will revive the dying institution of marriage

After the past few days and a heap of gay marriage stories, I was checking facebook neurotically, because, well, that is what I do. And I had a thought. If facebook doesn’t discriminate against same-sex unions, why does the United States?

Crystal and I have been happily engaged for almost two years. We’d get married, but there are maturity issues at hand. Eventually we will. We are in <3. id="fullpost">

Plus, marriage as an institution is a bit on the rocks anyways. It could use some sprucing up. When a new people are given a freedom it revives the population, and they are way more serious about it then the base population. Look at all those women voters! They remain an instrumental voting block even today. Black people, too.

Also, if history has taught us anything, it is the will of the minority will succeed. America is all about that. We are a people who rose out of oppression. And yet, we still oppress because we can’t quite get over our faults. I’d say we have some mommy issues.

I think the best example of American ideals is expressed in To Kill A Mockingbird, when Scout determines that bullies are often bullies because they thrive on being better than others. It’s that mean girl mentality popping up again. As long as there is a population bullies can belittle, they will snatch it up and hold on to it for dear life. Because no matter what happens, at least their not gay. Haha. Gays.

Well, as of Monday, California agreed with Facebook and decided not to be such a bully. Or you know, discriminate based on sexual orientation. (This was the result of overturning two laws on May 15. In November the issue will go to the public.) And just a few weeks ago, our glorious New York Governor instructed NY agencies to recognize same-sex unions preformed in other states.

To be expected, both of these events caused more than their fair share of backlash. The New York Times reported that Mathew D. Staver, founder and chairman of the Liberty Counsel—one of the conservative legal groups challenging the California law, said that the ceremonies “make a mockery of marriage.”

Personally, I think Crystal and my marriage isn’t really any of Mr. Staver’s goddamn business, being that he wouldn’t be an active participant. Well I mean, unless he’s hot. Sometimes we allow in a third when we’re feeling frisky. We’re gay, so obviously we’re promiscuous. But we’re also not men, so it’s not like we have AIDS. Not that it should matter because it is illegal to discriminate based on AIDS as well. (side note: I announced that I had aids in the office today, and somebody told me that’s good b/c now I can’t get fired. Sweet.)

Come on America, let’s grow up and get over bigotry. Especially over something as desperate for good PR as marriage. If we’re going to waste a ton of energy fighting the constitution because we don’t believe in equal rights, lets do it for something worthwhile, like persecuting gingers.